top of page
  • Writer's pictureBlue Marriage

Praying Together: Harder Than You May Think


We’ve read it and we believe it, but doing it has become much more of a struggle than ever imagined.

Praying together as a couple would seem like the most natural act between two people who love each other. Taking it a step further, how about two believers who love each other and engage in an active prayer life?

While it would also appear praying together would be just as much a part of the loving relationship as saying, “I love you,” it often becomes a sticking point in relationships.

Why is it so difficult?


Time, or the claim to have an absence of it, is the most often cited reason for not praying together as a couple. While there may be legitimate occasions where extreme schedules prohibit praying together, those moments are rare.

Praying together doesn’t require all day marathon prayer sessions. A genuine 5-minute investment of spirit-filled time in God’s presence is worth more than every business meeting or busy schedule.

Where to find the time:

  1. Wake up 10 minutes earlier

  2. Facetime each other over lunch

  3. While waiting for your kids at practice

  4. Before bedtime


Men usually have a more difficult time initiating couple’s prayer. The biblical expectation places man as the head of household. This also means the spiritual leader as well.

Most men simply don’t know how to get started. If it were a sport or fixing the car, they’d roll up their sleeves and get it done. When it comes to leading his wife in prayer, the proverbial brakes get mashed.

There’s an intimidation factor with intimately praying with your spouse. What if you’re prayers are not significant or spoken eloquently enough? How about if you don’t say the right things or don’t know exactly what to say? Is your spouse going to lose respect for you?

Men, this is not a case of silence is golden. It’s a time for you to ask God for guidance and the words to speak. Praying should make you feel vulnerable. It’s God you’re talking to after all.

Where to find the courage:

  1. Don’t try being courageous.

  2. Accept that you aren’t in charge

  3. Expect a blessing for your obedience

  4. Know you are not being judged by your spouse

Above the Radar

Once a couple goes all out in God’s service, it’s not uncommon for satan to begin mingling in their affairs. Praying couples mean they’re drawing ever closer to Christ.  That closeness begins to squeeze out space for temptation and marital strife.

Christians have admitted to living below the spiritual radar in hopes of avoiding satan’s attentions. An uncertain spouse with unconfessed sin may fear unintentional discovery by their spouse or may feel their Achilles heel may become a focal point that brings destruction to the marriage if old habits resurface.

Men, this isn’t a case of letting sleeping dogs lie. Get in the fight. Armor up with the word of God and allow Him to defeat your enemy. He will bless your marriage for your faithfulness.

How To Start

  1. Keep your prayers casual

  2. Schedule a set time each day

  3. Keep your prayers short but to the point

  4. Don’t worry about memorizing scripture

  5. Open your mouth and your heart will follow

  6. Ask your spouse if there are prayer requests

  7. Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s presence

Do You Pray As A Couple?

If you gained from reading, Praying Together: Harder Than You May Think, please leave a comment below.


bottom of page